Feeling Overwhelmed as a New Mom? Try the 10% Method to Feel More in Control
By Marianna Babiolakis, AMFT #134136, PMH-C
Supervised by Dani Salzer, LMFT #102811
Serving Campbell, San Jose, and clients throughout California via telehealth
Let’s be real - life as a new mom can feel like a constant cycle of “firsts.”
The first time leaving the house with the baby.
The first daycare drop-off.
The first solo grocery trip with a diaper bag in one hand and a crying infant in the other.
These moments are huge. And sometimes, they can feel... paralyzing.
Enter: The 10% Method
This isn’t about pushing through or hustling harder. It’s about easing in - because small steps matter. Especially when you’re tired, overwhelmed, and trying to figure out life with a tiny human.
So, What Is the 10% Method?
It’s a mindset shift. Instead of jumping straight into the big thing, you take it 10% at a time. You break the goal into the tiniest, most doable steps.
It’s about:
Progress over perfection
Confidence through repetition
Compassion over pressure
Let’s Take an Example: Grocery Shopping with Baby
Sounds simple, right? But if you’ve just had a baby, even imagining this outing might spike your heart rate.
What if the baby cries in the store?
What if you forget something?
What if you can’t fit the car seat in the cart?
Here’s how the 10% Method might look in real life:
Day 1: Put the baby in the car seat. That’s it. Hang out like that for a minute. Win.
Day 2: Put the baby in the car seat, carry them to the car, and click them in. Still don’t go anywhere. You’re just getting familiar. Great job.
Day 3: Do all of the above - and then drive around the block. Keep it short. Put on your favorite song if it helps.
Day 4: Drive to the grocery store parking lot. Don’t get out. Just notice how it feels to be there.
Day 5: Get out of the car. Go in. Maybe grab one item and head home. This isn’t a high-stakes grocery run - just practice.
Day 6 and beyond: You gradually build your way up to a full shopping trip.
This Works Beyond Grocery Runs
The same idea applies to:
Daycare transitions
Postpartum socializing
Returning to work
Taking time for yourself
Instead of diving in all at once, you dip a toe. Then a foot. Then you wade in - slowly and on your timeline. As you go, you might even find you gain momentum and skip some steps.
Why the 10% Method Works
It builds confidence. Your nervous system starts to feel safer. Each step reminds you: “I can do this.”
It allows for flexibility. If one day feels like too much, stay where you are or go back a step. No shame.
It honors your experience. There’s no one right way to move through new motherhood. This method meets you where you are.
You’re Not Behind
Maybe this all feels too slow. Maybe you see others out there doing full outings while you’re just trying to take a shower. Please remember: you’re not behind.
You’re building something sustainable. You’re honoring your nervous system, your baby’s needs, and your own capacity.
Try Asking Yourself:
What does 10% look like today?
That little step? It counts. And you’re doing better than you think.
Want more support as you adjust to life with baby?
I specialize in therapy for moms in the Bay Area (and online for clients in California) - including postpartum anxiety, overwhelm, and identity shifts. Learn more or schedule a free consultation here.
